Pardon My French


Pardon my French

“S’il vous plait”



No, we are not talking about that famous four letter word “cash”. We are talking about hiding your goods. The French pukes not only gave us the guillotine but also gave us a word that means “to HIDE” huh, go figure.


So let’s talk about the stashing of the goods for whatever occurs. You may ask the question, “How shall I do such a thing, beans and rice, rice and beans, potable water, fuel, off grid, on grid, survival in place or making an offsite camp?” This process of “Preparedness” is often called the rabbit hole it can be a daunting task unless you break it down to its basic elements.


So keep your hands and feet inside the cart and keep your safety belt secured at all times and enjoy the ride and away we go. Let’s break it down, shall we?

People try to make this portion so difficult and it can be if you let them convince you it must be done right now cause “panic” sells. There is a saying I hear often and that is “go big or go home!” I am not a huge subscriber of this notion in this instance however, I do like the going home part as I do subscribe to the “hunker down” theory, but that is another article for another day. Today we speak of the dreaded rabbit holes called dun,dun,dun…..”PREPAREDNESS” (I typed that in my most scary tone with an added echo).


If you listen to those trying to sell you something preparedness related then you will need to do it all right now and you will need to spend a ton of money with them to get yourself ready for the impending doom that awaits us all…..(insert your own favorite scary tones here). Don’t get me wrong there are a lot of good preparedness products out there and I don’t begrudge them a bit for capitalizing on a much needed industry. If you have hundreds and dare I say thousands of dollars to invest in the process of being prepared then spend it because if you haven’t started as of yet in my belief you are way behind the power curve! If you are like the majority of us “middle classers” getting made poorer by the irresponsibility of our elected officials it will take a little time to accumulate a proper cache of stored goods and resources to include trade goods. Despite the dooms day crowd trying to make a buck on your late arrival to the movement the process does not have to break your bank if you just ration it out logically. But someone needs to give you a wakeup call. So here it is GET OFF YOUR DEAD ASS AND START PREPAREING! Simple enough?


The basic process of being prepared is relatively simple, as simple as 1, 2 and 3. First, think what you normally purchase and take some time to make a list of products you actually use over a given month. The listing can usually be done in the first two weeks and also gives you a good idea of just how much stuff you can consume. The second step is to identify the absolute necessities that you and your family will need to survive. Be generous in your item selection but try to keep it in mind your necessities, throw out the Twinkies and junk food crap and just concentrate on the necessities needed to survive here’s a clue, air, food, water and shelter. The third step once you have identified these items, go get them. I always suggest you have a budget and stick to it. We have stores that run specials every week they also accept coupons and price match. Kellene Bishop over at the preparedness Pro had a great article about using coupons here’s the link


 I thought this was a fantastic article and suggest you read it but I am not talking about solely using the coupons you get in the Sunday paper because I have found that when you are building your Cache they are usually not what you need when you need them. I do advocate the using the coupons if you can find them as well as going to grocery stores that offer deep discounts on dry goods and can goods every day. In most cities they are stores that cater to the WIC recipients and or food stamp folks but you don’t have to be a Government handout recipient to go in there. If you can stomach the government handout crowd then I encourage you to go to these stores and take advantage of your tax dollars hard at work.


Spread your budget out in the various food groups. And do not forget the desert group as you regular readers know I personally fill this order in Girl Scout cookies. You can also use the warehouse stores with great results if you can afford the bulk buying process. I was on a photography shoot in the Virgin Islands recently and was surprised to know they also have warehouse stores. It was their version of a Sam’s club except they only accepted cash, note to self! My point being these are great resources go with a friend that has a membership if you do not have one but in most cases the membership fees to these club stores can be a tax deduction if you itemize.


I recommend for those on an extremely tight budget to split your extra purchasing of product into food groups. Buy one food group with one installment and another food group with the next. You can save money by buying in bulk regardless of your method you will start seeing the fruits of your efforts immediately. Seeing your efforts multiply is very important because it will keep you encouraged to move forward with your preparedness plan as well as the whole preparedness process. Those who have a little more disposable income to put towards the store house, I recommend buying extra goods as you go to the grocery store or the specialty stores for the food related items. I have even encouraged people on a real tight budget to ask for gift certificates and cases of canned goods for celebrated holidays, Christmas, Father’s Day, Mother’s Day, and birthdays for example.


Be prepared that if you exercise this option you will get a ton of weird looks and be called names and your family, you know you’re so called support system will make fun of you and have fun at your expense. However, take solace in this thought even if the only thing that happens is a spike in food market prices you will not feel the sting quite as hard as they whom do not prepare will. Also if the SHTF they will be the first on your doorstep! Who’s the crazy Prepper now? Neener, neener, neener! Now back to the cache.


With this accumulated wealth of stored goods multiplying you may be run out of space for store housing items you need. What a nice thought but don’t stop preparing because that space can empty in a hurry in the face of an emergency. So at first you can store the new products in your current location but soon you will outgrow this area. You should use the time you spend accumulating your cache products to find, build or reuse a new larger area to cache you’re store house products. Also remember the way you store some of the items such as flour, sugar and corn meal and items should be considered as well.


Although I recommend stocking up on at the very least 6 months of food products and then further down the rabbit hole we go onto other products but that is definitely for another article. For now just concentrate on the items you absolutely need for you and your families survival FOOD and WATER and yes I said start off with the goal of six months supplies! The Red Cross recommends you keep a three day supply of the basic needs for everyone in your family.


This will help you if something was to disrupt your typical routines. However, it is recommended that you plan out a few more days for more serious events such as evacuations or even an event that qualifies in your mind as a SHTF event! There are several articles out there chatting up the proverbial 72 hour kits and bug out bags and believe it or not some folks even have a few thousand for sell but, with a little time and patience you can navigate through that particular portion of the rabbit hole. I personally have a 7 day supply of basic needs item to complement my 72 hour BOB they are always ready to be put in the vehicles. We check all our kits on a monthly basis to insure all is well.


There are hundreds of list posted out there in cyber land and you can just pick and choose which one of the items best suits your needs in your area. There are several books you can read on survival and they all offer list of items you may need or haven’t thought of. I continually research other people’s list to see if they may have thought of something or found a better product to use in the kits. It really is a decision for you to make because only you know the needs of your family but use the list you have researched as your base and build off of them. If you have questions or want recommendations for products I believe should absolutely be in your CACHE’s or even your BOB’s or BOV’s then you can always email me with questions or get on one of the many forums on Prepper sites. There are massive amounts of information out there for someone seeking it. May the wind fill your sails and continue seeking knowledge!


That’s how we roll at the Pirates Republic.

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