1. Stop doing things you dont want to do:
Although there are task that are unpleasant there are things we must do in order to achieve the desired goal. Too many times I run into people that state they “CAN’T” because they “HAVE” to do something. What a load of brass monkey balls! Instead of feeling like you have to do a thing, rather you do something that you want to do it , or “GET” to do it! An example I get to go to the Caribbean with the Salty Dawg and have an adventure or I “HAVE” to pay taxes. which one just sounds better? Both require personal funds and a lot of Rum and both can give you a headache but the “GET” win out over the “Have” everytime!
2. Communicate Clearly
People Waste so much time because they did not understand clearly what was expected of them. Thus, fostering ill will because their time is a valuable comodity and it has now been unwantingly squandered by scallywags! This is such a destryer of good will (that is corporate speak for time and money, and time is money) that they have come out with a battle plan to effectively combat this wasteful menace as evident everytime you hear some one repeat what you just said begining with “SO”.
As an example, I asked one of the crew to go down below and secure the 3 kegs of rum from those booze hounds because we have the wind at our backs and we need to make up time. What he heard was “Go down below and secure 3 kegs of Rum for the men”. Do you see the confusion? If he would have applied the corporate strategy to this conundrum it would have gone like this. “So what I hear you saying is you want me to go down below and get 3 kegs of rum for the men”. Right there he communicated to me he was a non listening bildge rat unable to follow direction… uh hum… so right then, I was given the opportunity to correctly express my instructions to him and look at all the confusion that could have been avoided by simple clear and consise communication. So what I hear you saying is what about number three.
3. Stop trying to please people:
This one is also a toughy because it is in a primal nature to want to be liked and or fit in. We fear rejection and scorn from people whether it be real or imaginary it still resides in most of the human race. People pleasing is a slop of no returns. If you dont believe me then try voluntering for a smaller organization. If you volunteer for one project and then volunteer to take on another then another and another until you burn yourself out with the only solution is to get away as fast as you can!
Some folks spend much of thier lives dedicated to pleasing others and it never seems to be gratifying nor ending because people just want more, more and more. As you seek a balance of charity and personal satisfaction someone is always in need and there are those that are never satisfied with what you have to offer which further detracts from your well being and then there are the lucky one that come to the realization of “WAIT A MINUTE >>>I AM THE ONLY ONE WHOM I HAVE TO PLEASE!”
This sounds like a selfish staement but as I have heard time and again that you are the only one responsible for your happiness! Others may contribute but ultimaely it is you! Service to others is a noble thing and we encourage it as long as their is a balance between giving and recieving. Find that balance if you can.
4. Say what you mean and mean what you say:
Man that ain’t no shit! This has been the folly of many of relationships! So much so they wrote a book about martians and venutians. Apparently those Aliens worked it out but humanity has a long way to go I reckon! My Grandma always said “If you can’t speak an honest word then shut the Hell up,” paraphrased of course but she was right. Uncle Sam calls it opting out of the conversation. I have always lived by a stead fast rule “Live your life so know one has a question as to what side your on” the only way that can be accomplished is by living honest, I am not suggesting I am an angel nor have I ever been but I can say I have lived honestly.
5. Trust your instincts:
What does your gut tell you? Have you ever came across someone that you simply did not like? You can’t really put your finger on it but something inside said this person was a scallywag and later you found out this person was of the lowest form of scant there was? Well matey’s thats your guts talking to ya and you better pay attention. Too many people dismiss their gut feeling because of the fear of being disliked. Fooey!! My gut tells me your a barnacle then I don’t waste another minute with you sucking up my oxegen! Poof I am outta there. Time is to short and friends are to precious to be screwing around with a human loser. Adios!
6. Never talk yourself down:
We ain’t talking off the ledge mate, we are referring to taking yourself out of “Going for It”! Have you ever known the answer but, someone says “are you sure” and then you start to question yourself only to realize you were correct all along but lacked the confidence to stand up and proclaim correctness. Quit it!
7. Follow your instincts:
This goes back to the “Gut Feelings” issue as seen above so refer to that. It is one thing to have instincts, another to trust those instincts and quite another to follow those instincts. Have you ever said “awe Man I should’ve…..” why didn’t you? If it does not intentionally harm someone then really want’s the big deal with trying? You may find you have a knack or a passion for something that you are really suited for, so give it a shot mate.
8. Do not fear the word no:
We have all grown up with the first three words we recognise Mama, Daddy and NO. No is not always a bad thing it is in place to protect us from harm or direct us onto a specific path. We beieve NO has such a negative conotation to it that we try to avoid it, for example no Lad wants the hear No when ask a Lass for her hand in matrimony…. that would just peg the old suck meter eh? You say that example just stinks! I say its better that you know now rather than spending a lifetime with the wrong person! What about “No Tresspassing”? This could mean stay off my lawn, or it could be telling you that this property is not safe and could be dangerous to you. “No Left Turn” says hey there is some oncoming traffic so it is recommended for you not to travel this path for your safety. you don’t have to follow the recommendation but it would prove to be prudent would’nt it?
9. Do not fear the word “Yes”:
I was once asked a question “What if no one wants it” when we were going to launch a product and in reply I made the statement I am worried more about if everybody wants one and we cannot fulfill orders and then customers move on to find another product and we fall into Mediocrity. Never fear the word “Yes” nor the Word “No”, both Have definatives about them. Unlike the Jedi Knights I am a black and white thinker, the unknown is in my opinion a pain in the Arse! Yes or No brings me defined peraminters in which I can grasp. No you cannot go into outerspace yet, doesn’t mean I can’t start building a rocket!
10. To thine own self be true:
Once again we find ourselves dealing with the old familiar us. To thine own self be true is such a great statement because it really is all incompassing. It covers relationships, finances, clothing, choices of all types in my opinion. I see it this way, upon asking myself ….”Self what would you recommend, the answer I give is correct” this only works if you are not a creeper kind of person. You should not intend to do harm and most people know the difference between what is right and what is wrong both morally and civically and you can always fall back on “when in doubt ….don’t!”